The past few days have been a slow, slow spiral down into the abysmal depths. And to add fuel to the metaphorical fire that is my emotional state now, I can't do nuts to make myself better cos I dont know how to. Or rather, in my attempts to make myself feel better, events and things just keep coming to hit me down further.

I don't just feel terrible. I think I am terrible.

Somehow, I start to convince myself that I trust people too easily. I seem to believe people and their seemingly-good-natured words too easily. At the end of the day, I feel cheated and manipulated. How am I going to resolve this issue? I seem to be avoiding this thing.. But it cant be for long. I'm thankful that he has been supportive all this while.. And for believing me for who and what I am, considering the short period of time that we have known each other.

Then I got to learn about some stuff during the coffee session yesterday wif a fren that got me really upset. I teared again. Just that kind of lost and helpless feeling.

And then I received an unexpected call today, and met up wif a rare guest. Talked for 2 hours, wif our tears just keep flowing down - in public. Reminisced about the past and updated abt the present. Talked about the disappointment and let-downs. Apologies and thank-yous. We ended the meet-up wif a hug and she wished me all the best...

The only consoling part for these past 3 days was that my car is out of the garage le. Yesh, my car met up wif yet another accident again for the dunno-how-many-times-th this year. I just think that my this car is just so unlucky lorrr.

I'm in need of a hug right now.

Labels: updates