Playing it repeatedly in my playlist. Nice one from Jason Mraz.

On a side note, I'm hooked on Poker! Heh.

The #1 hit on my playlist now!

I can almost see it

That dream I'm dreamin' but

There's a voice inside my head saying

you'll never reach it

Every step I'm taking

Every move I make feels

Lost with no direction

My faith is shakin

But I, I gotta keep trying'

Gotta keep my head held high

There's always gonna be another mountain

I'm always gonna wanna make it move

Always gonna be an uphill battle

Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there

Ain't about what's waiting on the other side

It's the climb

The struggles I'm facing

The chances I'm taking

Sometimes might knock me down but

No I'm not breaking

I may not know it

But these are the moments that

I'm gonna remember most, yeah

Story line: Guy and first girl had a five-year relationship. Because of a one night stand between the guy and a stranger, who ended up getting pregnant. The first girl ended up heart broken, tried all ways and means.. but a five-year relationship still lost to a 3-mth-old relationship. Sounds familiar? Yeah. Thats exactly the plot. Whoever said this kind of story line doesn't ever happen in reality? 

Coincidentally, as if it was all pre-planned.. I was watching this serial when the sms came in late on saturday night. As if I had anticipated it, I did send out a warning to my friend to be on 24-hrs standby over the weekends, and to drop me a sms if it really happened. As if I were God. I don't know, but I just sort of had a intuition that it was this weekends. I saw all these coming, ain't it? I was forever so prepared for it, ain't it? Yet, when reality sets in.. I felt my tears flowing down once more... Why am I still very much at 原点? 

Putting that aside, I really give them my blessings.. =)

I reflected over this long weekends. They always say, you wont know how to treasure until you've really lost them. And it was precisely because of this reason, I always tried to prolong the period of getting to know the guys. Cos I fear, I fear of losing the good ones again. I fear committing that fatal mistake again. But why is it that, I seem to have such bad eye sight? Of all the guys whom I've decided to choose seemed so... And of all the guys whom I've decided to let go, come to think of it, I seem to be regretting so much? I asked mummy why again. Why doesn't God let me have the ability to be able to choose properly? Why let me lose them and then make me experience the feelings of lost, dejection and regret? 

Mummy tells me to pluck up my courage. Happiness are meant to be fought for? And yet people tell me everything is all fated, and that it will come when the time is right.. Sounds so contradicting rite? 

Anyway, a song that I have been hearing for almost the whole day today.. 我的快乐 by 锦绣二重 - one of the theme songs from 命中注定我爱你. 

徘了徊了走了 错了过了等了

累了全都困了 烦的乱的等的

都是真的

疯的想的念的 不安的焦虑的

复杂的梦过的 拥有的失去的

怎么忘呢

你做过的伤 放困了你爱的音

那天的我等着你等成了摆设

我的你的她的 好的坏的难的

灰的蓝的黄的 酸的甜的苦的

都还记得

非常想要忘的 绝对不能忘的

我心要换你的 真的不行那么

只得放了

缳岛的火车载着我第几天了

忽然发现这一刻我不想你了

我的快乐 会回来的

只要清楚曾爱得那么深刻

不准问值不值得

我的快乐 会回来的

离开不是谁给了谁的选择

Yes, my happiness has long been deprived of. I have been doing well and strong. Just like the lead actress 陈欣怡, persevere on ba.. I still hope to believe that 我的快乐 会回来的... Jiayou =)